She remembered the devastation of buildings, of hope and loss of lives that Zerori would have otherwise not cared too deeply for… were it not so close to home - literally her home. She remembered having grown the nerve and resolved herself to not running anymore; not leaving behind the ones she cared about because she was out of her depth. She was strong.

The heat of her own flames burn against her face as Liari held her by her jaw - impossibly tight as she spoke, the emotions just as cutting as the metal of her own helmet dug into her face.

She remembered that someone was there. Important. Someone she had met that had lost so much, had been there for her and she had been there for him and… yet she just-

A voice called out, holding out a hand as they yelled at her that they needed to grab onto his hand.

-Can’t remember.

—--

Blue eyes snapped wide open, a scream ripped from her throat as she jerked up in bed. In her ear, Zerori could feel the pounding of her heart and how her blood raced but everything else was like loud, deafening white noise. Struggling to catch her breath, it would be a few seconds before Zerori would realize she was holding a blaster in hand whilst holding her jaw. As the moments passed in a cold drift, frozen in time, her heart would gradually calm until it was a loud but steady thump against her chest. She lowered her gun and released her breath in a shudder, “Goddamn it…”

For weeks it felt like she’d had this dream - vague and familiar all at once yet for all the ways she managed to cope with the same haunting face of Liari, she was just as lost as she ever was. The blank face in her dreams went unidentified - as always - but she knew there was a time when she could remember them. Their clothes, their voice, their… their face. Now, though, it taunted her; torturing the mercenary in a way she’d never thought she could. It had been weeks - months even - since she’d been in that battle for East City before she’d been whisked away to safety. She never knew the fate of those who’d stayed but that was by design after her cowardly departure.

Tossing off the covers, Zerori stashed her gun back under the pillow before walking from her bed over to the bathroom. With a flick of the switch, the light came on to reveal the haggard and sleepless visage of her own face. Why wouldn’t she look so terrible, though? When you struggled for sleep and couldn’t even come to terms with the ghosts of what your dreams meant… what closure did she have? From the other room, closed off by a door, the only soul that kept her company these days yowled for food. She closed her eyes, giving a scoff as a smile came unbidden to her face, “I hear you, Twilight.” She called with her voice raised.

Another, softer, meow acknowledged her words.

She cracked her neck, ready to begin her day once more in what she could only call her… exile.

—--

Four weeks after the retreat from East City
New Apartment, South City
-

Before Zerori had lost her memory of who Athren was, she’d had to go through the hell of her own emotions and guilt before something amazing and terrifying all at once had happened. Whether it was to help her heal from the emotional damage or because he’d been planning on it ever since he returned from space, Zerori would have never expected the stoic man she’d come to expect to actually propose to her. Rather, she certainly expected it-!

-just not weeks after she’d shown just how much of a coward she was. What worth had she to give him if she couldn’t protect the city she loved; much less herself. Yet, in spite of her clear lack of self-confidence… how could she have said no? It had been the best news she’d gotten when the days felt as if they’d passed with such slowness that she could have been hidden away for years and wouldn’t have noticed that it had only been days.

Now, weeks later, Zerori had been keeping herself busy with a few important phone calls in regards to her business. She hadn’t had the heart to manage it ever since that day but after more than a dozen calls, text messages and a few concerned house calls from her subordinates (about their pay, of course) Zerori had slapped the shit out of herself and decided to stop being such a little bitch. Her time in ‘isolation’ wasn’t over by any means but she didn’t have to contemplate bringing the Red Doll out into the public eye.

Instead, she handled all of her affairs as discreetly as possible; which meant taking care of the jobs she’d set aside for the ones she paid for by herself. At first, the anxiety of not knowing when she’d see the faces of the people she left behind would come to not just haunt her daymares but also come seeking vengeance for her cowardice kept her cautious. She did the job without preamble, didn’t fuck around, and returned to her self-isolation. Anywhere around Athren felt safe. It was easy to feel that way when she knew he could just… whisk her away somewhere again.

The next job was easier, however and she’d even felt like her own self again when the job in question ‘resisted’. It was brief, the feeling of having control and power over someone, but it was enough to make Zerori want it again.

And again.

… and again.

Jobs once or twice a week that’d only before indulged in once or twice a MONTH before the events in East City quickly became a daily occurrence. While Zerori truly loved Athren, she couldn’t deny any longer that the guilt she felt still festered like a wound unchecked. No longer visible on the outside and begging for attention but a steady pulse of pain every time she smiled at him or told him those three little words. It became easier to leave on ‘business’ and he never questioned her - never told her that she spent too much time on work and not enough time on him.

He wasn’t built that way, anyway.

One day, on the morning after a mission that had gone exceedingly well, Zerori had returned to her apartment. Yet instead of finding Athren as she usually did, it had been unusually cold and empty. Nothing had been taken or was out of the ordinary. It just felt… lonely. The first time, she didn’t think anything of it and had taken a shower to wash off the blood and went to sleep with the intention to call when she awoke.

The next day, he never answered his phone. It wasn’t even on. As unusual as that was, Zerori had decided that maybe he was just busy. It felt like a proper reason. Except as day after day passed, Zerori would come to find that reasons felt like excuses and the excuses she made for him with every passing day was like a bandaid on a wound that just kept bleeding out slowly.

Invasive thoughts became more prevalent; he was tired of her, didn’t have the time, made a mistake in proposing to her, she was too busy for him. One after another came, ravaged her confidence, before she went on another mission to hide the pain and abandonment behind the growing acts of cruelty she was starting to believe weren’t so bad after all.

Eventually one day she just…

Couldn’t…

Remember.

She’d woken up, scratched the back of her head and wondered where her cat was before she’d picked up her phone and there (staring her in the face) was a name she didn’t recognize. She’d called this name numerous times, likely had even texted them a few times with little response back, before eventually believing that maybe they were just a friend that had had enough of being ignored. Good on them for thinking of themselves, right?

Except, as she’d gotten ready for the day and fed her cat, the feeling of a ring on her finger felt heavy and meaningful. Where had it come from again? She wasn’t really a jewelry person but no matter how many times she’d thought about taking it off or selling it for some quick cash - she hesitated and felt that familiar guilt she couldn’t seem to place anymore grow and grow until she eventually decided that it had to be important. Whoever it had gotten it for her wasn’t around anymore but she just… couldn’t part with it.

So she kept up the missions, worked on herself and had even decided to break the old suit out again. It stung to see the helmet still broken where Liari had nearly crushed it around her skull but she didn’t want to see her hard work go to waste anymore.

SHE didn’t want to waste away anymore!

With an anger so deep in her soul, Zerori reached out to the helmet that sat upon the mannequin. She glared at it with such an intensity she was surprised it hadn’t started to melt before she looked back at the armor and steeled her heart.

The Red Doll would return again.

—----

It was a normal day, all things considered, as the women of the ‘Maker’s Baker’ did their job. They’d long since believed that their wayward boss had decided to allow the business to die off slowly. While loyalty was certainly a fine thing to have, the crux of the problem was that they had a job and so long as they were getting paid - that was how long their loyalty would actually last. In the times that Zerori had visited (that grew fewer and fewer as the weeks went on) they all knew it was only a matter of time.

So when the bell of the door rang on a late Saturday evening, just minutes before closing, Janet knew that something was up. Standing from behind the counter with a gun held out of sight if there was an intruder that just HAD to test their luck tonight, Janet would get the fright of a lifetime as it was none other than her boss that had actually walked through the door. Drenched from head to toe from the onslaught of the rain that was pouring outside, the hybrid woman looked less like a person and more like a nightmarish specter. “Lord in Heaven-!” Janet gasped, earning a smile from Zerori.

“Sorry, was it the hair?” She teased, her usually spikey mullet now a flop of heavy soggy hair.

It took Janet a moment to calm herself, a hand over her heart to try and slow it’s racing before she sighed, “We haven’t seen you for weeks; half expected the business to go belly up any time now.”

Zerori laughed, “It most certainly would have but, ah… let’s just say I’ve had a burst of inspiration. You got the key to the basement, yeah?”

Janet cocked an eyebrow at Zerori before putting her gun on the counter and pressing a false tab in on a shelf inside. With a click, the key to the basement in question would be there, dull from a lack of use but most certainly still usable. Janet stared at it for a moment, contemplative, before she looked up at Zerori. She wasn’t a betting woman by any means, preferring to let the facts speak for themselves before ever bringing chance into it.

She’d known Zerori for a while now, though and even if she was different these last few months… there was always a sliver of the woman that had hired them for reconnaissance. Today, however, there was something else there. Someone else.

She wasn’t sure if this was the woman that hired her anymore.

Pressing the key to the counter, Janet slid it toward her boss.

This was still the person who paid her, however.

“Yes Ma'am.”

With a nod, as if none the wiser to Janet’s introspective thoughts, Zerori closed the distance between herself and the counter with a few slow but determined steps. When she stopped just short of the table, her gaze locked on the key that was presented to her, she’d wait an awkward several seconds before she reached for it. Her fingertips were cracked and dry, small bits of blood in the fingernails as if she’d only just recently tried to wash her hands.

“I could always count on you guys,” Zerori would then say, her voice chillingly soft before she turned away toward the locked door of the basement, “Thank you.” And with nothing else to be said, Zerori would soon disappear into the depths of her safe house that hadn’t seen use ever since the attack on East City.

At the counter, Janet’s heart would be racing with a fear unlike anything she’d ever felt. Her eyes were wide, filled with unshed tears, before she pulled her hand to her mouth to try and stifle a soft gasp. “She… She’s changed-! Lord have mercy.” It was only ever briefly but Janet would never forget the look in Zerori’s eyes and how they literally glowed red.

…
..
.

Step by step, Zerori descended the stairs in the darkness (hardly bothered by it, either) until she stood upon the cold metal of the floor and looked toward the Gravity Chamber she’d created what felt like YEARS ago. She’d stopped using it for… for some reason. The faceless man who gave her this ring, most likely. Absently, Zerori began to toy with the ring along her finger - spinning it slowly as she swallowed the emotional response she never could quite ignore.

He had a ship, she knew where it was - she could get stronger there than she ever could here. Yet, as she remembered the time spent with this man and how they’d interacted; the anger she was much more familiar with began to bubble back up to the surface and she dropped her arm suddenly before stalking over to the door of the chamber. She clawed it open, a snarl on her face before strutting inside and immediately barking out orders, “Lights. ON!”

A mute, pregnant pause made Zerori think the AI inside didn’t recognize her anymore before the thrum of power was like music to her ears. Lights flickered on, the white iridescents followed by the angry flicker of red that had her heart begin to race again.

Welcome, Zerori. To what level shall we begin? Came the robotic but feminine voice of her AI.

Taking in a deep breath to try and control the sea of rage that threatened to steal her sense, Zerori remembered the training she’d done over the course of these past months; what was NEEDED to be learned to actually disappear from the eyes of the world. More centered, Zerori declared with a deceptively calm voice.

“Maximum level. I’m going to be here for a while… Set a reminder for me, as well? Upgrades. Four of them. I’ll take out a loan or something to expedite the supplies.”

She was back, better and ready to stay.